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News for February 2011

Album Review: Sick of Sarah, 2205

A lot of people ask me to review things, products, services, films, music. A lot of it is independent stuff looking for some good promotion, and let’s face it, with nearly 4 million readership now and close to 100k fans across all social network accounts, you can’t BUY that kind of publicity with an audience that actively read my rants to find cool new things, or get an opinion on something to avoid shooting themselves in the foot with buyers remorse.

This, however, becomes tiresome, and is quite a double edge sword because well, frankly, I don’t have the extremely high Klout rating (ie: I don’t bullshit, and my users take my reviews seriously, and are likely to base their purchasing on my opinion) without maintaining integrity.

This, in the case of the girl band Sick of Sarah, is not going to work in their favor. Their album looked okay, their promo pics looked … well, they’re a bunch of wannabe scene skanks with their faces pierced shut and the personal grooming habits of a housing commission crack den troglodyte.

I thought I’d keep open minded and give it a shot. The first track I listened to had me skipping through it, and the second, before I knew it I was done with the album.

Their sound is not unique, their production quality is low, their vocalist is droll, the overall talent and skill lacking is compounded by overpowering vocals (a common problem with independent label bands, where ego means the mixer has vox on 11 and the rest of the band on 1) and just really dumb lyrical content.

Their music is as unpolished and unfinished as they look, so in this case you really can judge a book by it’s cover.

Artists be warned, hassling me to review your stuff will lead to me doing it honestly.

I’d have to be legit and give this album a 2/10. If they weren’t female, they wouldn’t exist, and judging from their (lacking) skills with instruments they must give really good head or something.

Posted: February 22nd, 2011
Categories: general
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An Interesting Difference (Men/Women)

One thing I’ve noticed over the years I just happened to think of and figured I should blog while it’s hot is the difference of socioeconomics and dating.

A guy has a new girlfriend, his friends will ask, “What’s she like?”, “Is she nice?” with “Is she cute?” as a second or third question.

A girl has a new boyfriend, her friends ask, “What does he do for work?”, “What kind of car does he drive?”, “Is he hot?”

I’ve noticed even personality questions tend to be lacking amongst most females, featuring far more on looks and wealth, whereas men base their views more on tolerability as a friend of the newly dating male.

Just throwing that out there. You never know, a few of you three odd million crazies who read my rants may very well hesitate before being superficial, and maybe, just maybe, might adjust your behavior to a value set more cohesive with sanity. 🙂

Posted: February 18th, 2011
Categories: general
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An Open Letter to TV Executives

You know how you love your reality TV more than we do? And how you enjoy having every advert interruption at a forced cliff hanger moment? Any show that involves voting or results of any form do this right?

Want to know a secret? I IQ2 (A variant of TeVo) my shows and fast forward through YOUR sponsors advertisements, you know, the guys who ultimately make your rubbish shows a reality financially?

So that means because of your showing style, your sponsors get far less views of their adverts than any others.

Food for thought, and the dictionary definition of cutting off ones nose to spite their face! 🙂

Posted: February 18th, 2011
Categories: general
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Tim Burton’s Alice in Blunderland

Purely for the fact Tim Burton made it, I’ve assured myself not to provide rating to his production, and refrained from watching it in any way. Eventually pirating it just to provide myself with the smug satisfaction of aloof yet all knowingness I figured it’s time I watch my pirated version (which I seeded more than anything ever, purely to hurt his profit margin) of what was originally pitched as American McGee’s Alice in Wonderland, which I may add is a fucking spectacular take on Alice providing an edgy modernised take on the timeless classic.

First and foremost, I can’t possibly get my head around Elijah Wood’s random Scottish accent, oh wait, I mean Johnny Depp (Why waste make up? Hire the fucking actor in the first place.) nor am I surprised at the cronyism of him putting his bulbous headed wife in the role of a bulbous headed ugly mole, maybe her lack of digital editing allowed extra budget to Elijah-ize Depp, shame they can’t CGI lack of acting ability.

But alas, my main gripe with this trivial film that purely scored ratings by children of women who clearly were on serious doses of valium or xanax or other mind altering substances to provide the approximate level of mild retardation requisite for any form of understanding of, or appreciation of, this idiocy falls down to the premise.

If I were to take a bunch of children, put them in a drama class (See: Encouraging little brattish twats to be extroverted little brattish twats) and demanded they take all absurdity for the sake of absurdity (being the mainstay of CS Lewis’ drug induced drivel of that era) and ask them to invent some idiotic conception of every random word he made up for his childrens amusement, we would come to the same conclusion Burton has, at 1,000,000th the price.

If anyone were to do to say, JRR Tolkien, what Burton has done to CS Lewis, there’d be a public outcry, or hopefully an assassination. Sadly however, Hollywood has again taken something potentially awesome, handed it to a sophmoric assinine moron and let him run with it and demolish any possible credibility the franchise could have attained.

This is by far one of the highest quality, best cinematographied, brilliantly themed and decorated (as far as sets, costumes, et cetera go) films I have EVER seen with absolutely no substance and a narrative so piss weak it could be a gerbil smeared in vasoline up someones arse.

I’d rate this, but it’d be breaking the laws of fucking physics. CANNOT DIVIDE BY ZERO.

Posted: February 15th, 2011
Categories: general
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Will @juliagillardpm Dog an Aussie in Need?

Wikileads founder Julian Assange has called on Prime Minister Julia Gillard to put her foot down and offer him protection from the US government.

The whistleblower made the comments as he prepared to face a London court next week for the start of legal proceedings to have him extradited to Sweden on possible sexual assault charges.

Supporters claim the charges have been trumped up to silence him.

“Gillard needs to declare publicly that this is not an acceptable treatment of an Australian organisation. WikiLeaks is registered in Australia,” Mr Assange told the Seven Network.

“Nor is it acceptable treatment of an Australian.”

The US government is looking at whether the whistleblower can also be charged over the release of classified documents on his WikiLeaks website.

Mr Assange said he wanted to return home to Australia with a guarantee he would not be handed over to the US government.

“I’d like to return immediately,” Mr Assange said said.

“I would have returned to Australia in November, but our view and our intelligence was that it was not safe in Australia.”

Mr Assange described WikiLeaks as a “source protection agency”.

Earlier today, Assange’s mother said Ms Gillard must stand up the US, adding the Australia-US alliance could survive some honest criticism of its handling of the matter.

“She’s got many people in Australia who don’t follow her position on this,” Ms Assange said.

“There is a lot of dissention among her ranks in the Labor Party over it.

“She has to be a true leader and not a sycophant of the US and in fact maybe help the US realise their freedom of speech is one of the most important attributes of their culture.”

Mrs Assange also called for donations to a new legal defence fund for her son, set up after his accounts were frozen.

The Assange family’s latest comments come ahead of WikiLeaks’ planned video conference late tonight, to which members of the public were invited to submit questions via Twitter and email.

Related:

Gillard a sycophant, says Assange’s mum NEWS.com.au, 4 hours ago
Assange a dobber, magazine reckons
Herald Sun, 8 days ago
Assange supporters take to streets
Adelaide Now, 15 Jan 2011
WikiLeaker not tech terrorist, says lawyer
Adelaide Now, 20 Dec 2010

Posted: February 1st, 2011
Categories: celebrity gossip, epiclullz
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