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News for the ‘general’ Category

Shameful Highway Robbery by @BlacktownCC of Disabled Permit Holders

I copped a $155 fine for parking forwards in a disabled bay in a line of rear to curb parking, which is completely legal, as the disabled person has difficulty getting out and they can’t enforce that kind of stuff on disabled bays.

The parking attendant ran off like a bitch (took photos and drove away) when I approached them to explain that the vehicle was still running / not parked. They didn’t give me a ticket, filed it as delivered, then set the SDRO on me with an enforcement order. Now I have to pay $55 to have a CHANCE at legal recourse / due process.

Irony being at the time a bunch of guys at a fruit and veg store were jeering them, screaming something in Arabic, and telling them to ‘fuck off, his passenger is disabled and he’s helping her out’ while a 500 year old extremely disabled woman was being manhandled out the door of the very narrow parks by me while they were being ninja photographers.

The RTA/RMS and Blacktown city council parking officers here are a fucking joke, that’s just inappropriate, inhuman, and disgusting. The best part is they have you stitched with so much red tape it’s easier to pay the $155 than see justice done and they RELY on that to fuck everyone over and raise surprise taxes off everyone with highway robbery. The SDRO woman I rang was unsympathetic and entirely disinterested, she even went as far as taunting me calling me stupid for not ‘ringing the SDRO if I saw a guy writing a ticket’ when 1. tickets aren’t filed for anywhere up to 30 days, 2. I wasn’t given a ticket just an enforcement order, and 3. I’m not psychic and didn’t know who to call. She told me ‘that’s the price of ignorance.’

My only recourse is to hope I can be given the privilege of taking it to court; whereas all other first world countries have the essential human right of due process, in Australia our statutory authorities are a law unto themselves. Hell, the RTA/RMS can still deduct points off your license if they want even if a court finds you innocent of what they’re claiming. It’s absolutely wrong, abhorrent, and disgusting.

The old lady I was helping out offered to pay the fine, but that’s a fortnight of her pension so I flat refused. She has no family and her husband has really bad dementia and is in a home, so she’s on her own and has no one to help her, and apparently the reward for being a good citizen from Blacktown Council is getting butt raped with surprise fines.

Today is a sad, sad day to be a resident of this area, clearly they are inheriting the traits of Sydney CBD and using us motorists as an easy revenue raising system. If anyone is aware of any civil disobedience or action groups to resist and overthrow these zany unconstitutional statutory authorities or cause them grief let me know. I’ll quite gladly throw my 50k+ social networks and 8m readership into the fight.

This entire nation is an abundance of surprise tax, fines, licenses, fees, etc. even including things like ‘stamp duty’ on cars, something even the SDRO couldn’t tell me what it’s for, what ‘stamping’ is involved, or why my ‘stamp duty’ surprise tax goes to ‘public schools, parks and civil buildings’ or why I should have to pay for those things when I don’t have kids, don’t use parks, or community halls.

It really is absurd. I am really reconsidering staying in Australia. I may have been born here but I was prudent enough to get citizenship from the country my father is from. Perhaps it’s time I go somewhere less tax happy where citizens aren’t punished arbitrarily for success, or in this case, philanthropic pursuits?

Posted: August 20th, 2012
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White men are no longer being accepted by the SA Airways

Cadet pilot training course applications from white men are no longer being accepted by the SA Airways (SAA), it was reported on Friday.

SAA spokesman Kabelo Ledwaba told Beeld that the cadet programme was being advertised online as an initiative to bring pilot demographics in line with the country’s broader demographics.

“Only 15 percent of SAA’s pilots are currently black, and this includes Indians and coloureds. The rest are white, and 91 percent of them are men.”

Ledwaba said the airline would appoint male, white pilots when there were vacant posts for which applicants of other races could not be found.

Beeld had asked why white applicants were being rejected across the board.

An irate father had called the newspaper to complain that his son, who had a commercial pilot’s licence and met the educational and physical criteria, had been rejected on the grounds of race.

By filling out several dummy applications, Beeld established that the online form had been programmed to reject any white applicants.

 

Posted: August 18th, 2012
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The Assange Affair, UK Gone Wild & Julia Sits on Her Hands (@juliagillardpm @UKinUSA @ukinrussia @ukniqatar @ukinlebanon)

The UK have stated they will not allow Assange to leave the Ecuadorian embassy for safe passage after he was recently granted asylum. Never in the history of the world has one state raided the embassy of another over an allegation of possible sexual misconduct or harassment. The allegations have no evidence besides a statement by the alleged victims, which has absolutely no weight in the grand scheme of things. The entire Assange Affair is one of the most disgusting illustatrions of how nasty and manipulative world governments are, and how bitter and jaded the US government is for it’s own citizens being allowed to expose it for war crimes and acts of brutality.

The irony is, everything the US got caught out doing was a SERIOUS heinous act, a war crime in most cases exposed, which we should all condemn in disgust, and thank those who exposed them. Right now Bradley Manning is rotting away in the concentration camps at Guantanamo Bay, without due process, without trial, without charge. The anti-terrorism legislations brought in after 9/11 have done nothing to stop terrorists, but have led to thousands of wrongful and illegal detainments, search and seizures, and other woefully unjust acts that should make each and every sane rational person utterly disgusted and fearful of their leaders.

The UK is threatening to ‘storm’ the Ecuadorian embassy. They are blanket arresting protestors today all over the UK to try and keep it out of the media’s eye. They are behaving like absolute fucking animals, all because Uncle Sam has told them to get Assange to Sweden, where he ‘faces questioning’ in ‘regards to an allegations of sexual misconduct’, but all the while an extradition order is sitting there waiting for him in Sweden to be extradited to the United States to be brutally butt fucked without any sense of legality or justice and probably ‘vanished’ like thousands of others into concentration camps.

If they do this, I’m burning my British citizenship. I will NOT be a part of a nation state that commits such atrocious acts against justice and freedom. The mere threat they have posed is more vile an act than any violent terrorism, as whilst violence affects those injured and killed, legislative abuse affects every single citizen for the rest of their lives usually (as we’re helpless to repeal corrupt laws), and leave the entire nation living in fear more so than a plane hitting a tower ever would. You and I both know we aren’t scared of jihadi’s in lolcopters as much as we are of our crazy governments.

Here in Australia we have it too. The ASIO Act ammendments after 9/11 allow them to kidnap anyone without charge or warrant, and kidnap anyone who SEES the kidnapping who may reveal the kidnapping. I have seen court proceedings for similar matters with my own eyes, the prosecutors walked in and pretty much told the judge they’re holding these guys and didn’t state a charge, the judge said without a charge arresting and holding him is illegal, they said that there is a charge they just don’t have to tell the court what the charge is, nor the defendant (the person they kidnapped), nor anyone. He questioned the legality but eventually found that the legislation does in fact allow that; further the legislation allows them to also kidnap the judge should he so much as question them on the matter. In this case they didn’t.

This all sounds too Orwellian for me. I do not fear terrorists, I fear the police. I do not fear the Taliban, I fear politicians. I do not fear Al Qaeda, I fear our eroded vacuous rights. I do not fear the Middle East, I fear the United States.

I think many of you have the same feelings. We’re powerless, and now we’re living in a world where even if you try and express your rights to freedom of speech, or protest, you will most probably end up arrested. This leaves us with NO recourse to remove these fucking dreadful laws, as the politicians who aren’t corrupt asshats are too scared just as we are. At least the United States has a chance, their founding fathers were smart and left the right to bare arms in the constitution (albeit also eroded with time) for JUST THIS SITUATION, where the government is harming it’s people and needs to be forcibly removed.

Sadly in Australia we lack those rights, in fact it’s quite the opposite. The parliamentarians love the fact that most Australian’s have a deluded view of firearm ownership, and every few years they bring in more draconian gun laws that make legitimate firearm owners like myself have to pay thousands more in surprise tax, yet the criminal ownership of firearms is ever growing and the legitimate ownership is diminishing. I’ve mentioned before how Australia used to take home almost all the gold medals at the Olympics for shooting sports, but our shooters all jumped ship and moved overseas with the last change to the laws.

So we can’t talk, we can’t protest, we can’t fight back. What the fuck can we do? Seriously? HOW do we get horrific laws that give us absolutely no rights and give secret gestapo like police the ability to fuck you up anyway the please? I mean it’s even worse in New South Wales where I live; our state police have batshit powers, worse still, most of them are undereducated and do not know the law. They all have ‘university degrees’, but they’re from a diploma mill in Canberra and are the equivalent of a few 100 unit courses for two years as opposed to 1, 2, 3, 4 hundreds times 8 times two over four years.

I’m a lawyer by qualification, and even I’ve been gobsmacked with high school drop out roughian cops trying to argue incorrect and even patently absurd lines with me, but you have to cop it on the chin or they’ll make your life hell. You sure as fuck can’t get snarky with them, and have to show as much patience and eloquence as possible or you’re done for. And right there on the road side they are judge jury and executioner. The FEW laws that require the approval of a magistrate before they execute some heinous act on you (pinning you down and ripping your hair out for a DNA sample, shoving a gloved hand up your arse, you name it) are thwarted by the fact that THE POLICE HAVE A CHAMBER MAGISTRATE AT THE STATION WHO THEY EMPLOY. I fucking shit you not. The magistrates who have to sign off on their goose stepping are employees of the police. If that’s not corruption I don’t know what is.

Fuck, I don’t even remember where I’m going with this anymore. I’m sorry guys. I rarely lose the plot and you all know me more for my poignant arguments and rants of awesome. But this has been festering for about a decade now and every time I have to write about it I’m sickened even more by the fact that these cunts breathe the same air as me and claim to be the same species. They’re not. They’re some foul form of sub human that was beaten in the playground and spend the rest of their life finding ways to exert arbitrary ubiquitous and evil control over everyone around them. They’re reincarnated nazis, plain and fucking simple.

And guess what. We’re the Jews. I can’t do this anymore, I’m done writing.

Posted: August 17th, 2012
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News Limited’s @christoforpaine Racist Rant draws Internet Ire on Social Media

We Australian’s like to think we’re good sportsmen. The fact of the matter is, internationally, we’re notoriously bad sports. Sore losers, arrogant, and great at a few sports but mediocre at the rest.

We lost our Olympic gold medal shooters because our gun laws are insane, most skipped off to other nations. That left us with swimming. Yep, and that’s about it. The only sport we have left where we usually always get a gold or ten. We actually did better at shooting than swimming, but AU is a notorious nanny state, so they don’t like showing things that go bang on TV, most Australian’s didn’t even KNOW we had some of the worlds best shooters until 2008 when they all left.

Recently News Limited has been inciting racism, and racialised hatred between the UK and Australia in a tit for tat “LOL WE HAZ MOR MEDULZ DAN U” idiotic bitch fight by a social nobody, Chris Paine, who thought it would be hilarious to write a bitchy little rant attacking the British athletes, who I might add are our host nation for the games. On checking out his Twitter he has a whopping great following of SIX HUNDRED fans, seriously, how can someone who writes for a high profile website be such a social reject? Maybe his racist and bigoted attitude is also reflected on his social media posts? Who knows.

Shortly after The Sun retaliated with an equally awkward “We’re journalists, we don’t get out much, but we hope the kids still say cowabunga dude?!” reposte. They were hoping we wouldn’t all click that they’re the same company, of course, and did everything they could to portray it as a legit bitch fight between two seperate entities.

The bit where I got rubbed the wrong way was when it hit reddit. I saw my entire nation shamed in a global forum for the racist idiocy of one person. Rightly so, I might add, because his view was supported by hundreds of comments below the article by narrow minded ignorant twats who really should have been banned from purchasing a modem due to IQ deficiency. Oh, wait, they haven’t passed that law I’ve been lobbying for yet. Snap.

HAHAHAHA SEE, I’M AS FUNNY AS CHRIS PAINE.

Ok, back to task. These vapid little boorish cunts should be sacked for their efforts, IMHO. There’s enough intellectually handicapped fucktard twats in the press, the last thing we need is racist bigots added to that list. If they had ANY dignity they’d apologize and resign for their actions, in an era where we have their lame company pushing a #heroswalkaway theme against bullying, we have the same company spouting racist vitriol and hate? C’mon. Surely News Limited doesn’t support that kind of crap? I wouldn’t be shocked if they do, of course.

Here is the offending article, and the wry reply to the Sun’s retaliation post.

http://www.news.com.au/sport/london-olympics/borat-knows-best-when-it-comes-to-winning-gold-medals-team-gb-take-note/story-fndpu6dv-1226440264291

http://www.news.com.au/sport/london-olympics/oh-no-weve-offended-the-brits/story-fndpu6dv-1226444531757

It’s a bad day to be an Australian, utterly shameful.

Posted: August 7th, 2012
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@Twitter Discriminate Against their Userbase, Read This to Find out More (Trust me, it effects you too! (@Support))

It’s hard to get a big faceless corporation to talk to you. I personally have managed to get all kinds of big faceless corporations, arguably even the souless variety, to address serious issues in the past of inequity or unfairness. Consumer activism is a passion of mine that comes with the territory of reviewing products and services whilst being a tech and entertainment blogger.

I have personally had PR handlers from Microsoft, IBM, Facebook, Telstra, British Petroleum and many other huge multi-nationals contact me first go in reply to issues from faulty products, dangerous claims, or discrimination. But there is one egg I’ve yet to crack. Twitter.

I have almost 50,000 fans on Twitter on @bashpr0mpt and several other accounts nearing that under different projects I have run over the years. As a technology evangelist I promoted the absolute crap out of them, which is a hard line when Facebook rules the coop and only one in ten people are receptive to your “Hey, if you don’t use it, make an account and I’ll introduce you to a heap of cool people!” because they’re swamped and have Web 2.0 fatigue.

The problem is I’m just one of many people in the same boat. The U is silent in Web 2.0 but without it companies like Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, et al would not exist and wouldn’t be hiring and providing for the families of the very same people who ignore your reasonable requests and communication.

It’s 2012, most companies know that social media is integral to being accepted as a reputable brand, but it seems that social media companies–out of all companies the ones you think would know better–are the few who think they’re an exception to the rule.

My beef with Twitter has been ongoing for a few years now, every few weeks without fail I have people impersonating me trying to steal my fans. Given the subjects I review they’re quite often guerilla marketing guys selling technology or entertainment related products. Over the years I’ve built up significant demographic reach (each post of mine gets seen by approximately 8 million eyes within 24 hours) and brand recognition with the most important element being integrity.

If you’re a fellow geek, you’ll know this as ‘having extremely high klout,’ for the less tech savvy what that basically means is people take my reviews so deadly serious that they base actual real world purchases ‘frequently’ upon my recommendations. To retain this integrity I have turned down many cash-for-comment offers. Spnsrtwt have offered me $89 per Tweet to comment on things they want to flog. Twitt4cash a similar company have offered a flat rate of $500 per blog post reviewing a product.

Sounds good, right? Well, I guess it is. BUT. Yes there’s always a but. But my integrity will be sold out, and thus people wouldn’t actively pursue my reviews of products nor take them as seriously if they knew I was getting paid for it. In the past I have been given products and / or services for free, some of significant retail value, in hopes I will review their product. I do this but retain full autonomy and will not say something bad is good. I also get invitations to red carpet events for movies and games up the whazoo, which I usually gratefully accept and pass on to folks who would appreciate it far more than I, and then base my review on the actual product in question rather than the bells and whistles and wankery that goes on at PR handled events involving coloured floor coverings.

I don’t want to delve too deep into the ambiguity of what kind of a beast being a blogger is, but what I want you–the reader–to clearly ascertain is that internet celebrities have a lot of sway in consumerism as a whole. This can be a good thing if the person isn’t a dick about it. But with my interactions I also hold consumer activism close to my heart. My biggest piss of in the world is seeing innocent people ripped off by big companies.

This gets me back to Twitter. If you’re a cookie cut Z-grade IRL celebrity preferably of American citizenship, preferably with a PR firm who will threaten to not use their service if they don’t get super special treatment, social media companies will bend over backwards for you. If you are an internet celebrity who has helped in the growth and development of the social media companies, don’t threaten them, and don’t demand super special treatment you will be utterly invisible and not even get common decency dictates of behaviour such as protection from impersonation, abuse, stalkers, et cetera.

Twitter still verify accounts, actively. They also promote their idea of ‘celebrities’ to new users, very actively. They don’t however consider people with equal or larger followings than many of their ‘celebrities’ to be people of any merit if they are famous not for a non-speaking role in a late night community TV soap opera, or some lame vanity pressed record label. We, you and I, are nobodies to them. And that stinks!

I have written a final request to Twitter addressing this discrimination. If you are a normal person who hasn’t got a PR agent and has built a following by providing good content, sticking up for the underdog–the punter at home, the consumer–and using their service exactly how they want it to be used in a manner that makes it beneficial to all users and aids it’s growth and inevitably it’s value then you have a snowflakes chance in hell of being recommended to new users, and even less of being verified and protected from the plethora of spam bots, impersonators, and sociopaths who lurk within the interwebs.

Jf your mummy and daddy are rich and bought you a heavily auto-tuned studio hour along with a corny music video (lolhi Ms Black!), have a heavy handed threat weilding agent or lawyer, and tweet about inane things like how frequently you flatulate and not do anything to aid community growth or provide any semblence of intellectual communication beyond that of monosyllabilic grunts (lolhi Twitter rap stars!) then you are offered the basic protections of your brand, your identity, your fan base, and your individuality. Heck, they’ll crucify you if you dare threaten their Hollywood stereotyped celebrities in any way or even annoy them. They’ll also promote the crap out of you to their new users so you can fill their feed with afforementioned grunts rather than y’know, horrible boring stuff like science, games, movies, awesome and win. Before you know it, you’ll have as many fans as I do and you only have to post the occasional ‘lol i did teh buggst sht in teh l00 jus den jks lololol’ to get such benefits.

I have asked them to stop discriminating against Twitter celebrities versus IRL celebrities as many of us have a demographic cross over too. I’m not saying that intellectually vacuous gangsta rappers aren’t as entitled to Twitters protection as much as it’s other users. But I am saying that Twitter ought to remember that it’s the common person like you and I who made them, and when one of us (and thousands of us have!) become super popular BECAUSE of that delivery of good content and BECAUSE they stick up for the underdog and do the right thing by their fellow man they should at least have the same basic protection, verification, and propogation that Twitter offer Britney Spears.

I have sent them my final request to stop the discrimination, I also mentioned the two alternatives which are the last remaining sanctions I can take against them to show my disgust that in 2012 a company would disriminate a person based on their geographical location, their social status, and their occupation. That being 1. seeking an injunction ex parte from a magistrate to force Twitter to offer basic protection of brand, intellectual property, and identity to people equally as it is required based on their demographic and not whether they’re on TV or have an album, or 2. leaving Twitter and exercising the same amount of evangelical peer pressure that brought many of my friends there to leave it too for another service which doesn’t discriminate.

Now I know some of you are probably thinking “naww poor diddums is butthurt he doesn’t get a cool little blue tick like Kanye ‘Yommoletyewfinish’ West” but I want to make it brutally clear. We are you. You are us. Any one of you can be any one of us if you persevere and talk about something you love with dedication and passion. But! Unlike TV and music celebrities, internet celebrities have to provide a high quality product, our words, our voices, our ideas. We cannot autotune. We cannot pay a PR agency or a good sound studio to make up for mediocrity. And furthermore we cannot protect our brand and intellectual property to the degree of Kanye as we are, probably like you, not loaded and able to hire a team of lawyers to do so. Thus we are at the mercy of companies to do the right thing, just as they drop the ball with bullying, they also drop the ball with protection of their users brand and IP.

Well, this has turned into quite a wall of text. But I’ll leave it here.

The ball is in your court Twitter.

Edit: I am shocked at the response this post has gotten in a matter of minutes. I just want to thank you guys for the support. I would like to discourage direct attempts to lobby Twitter by filing support tickets, it’ll just flood them and probably desensitise their L1 customer service reps to what I’m trying to do here. Also it’s important to me that they see that I am just one person presenting an open moral and ethical problem to them, and I want to see if they do the right thing WITHOUT massive amounts of social pressure. That will tell us a lot more about them than simply making them give in because of the mass of responders.

Further Edit: I have had a person offer to create a website to publicize this issue to the media as a social interest / david v goliath matter and have agreed to let them do so if I don’t recieve a reply in 24 hours from Twitter as it really is an interesting issue that -needs- to be addressed by both the public (Via the media) and by corporations (via their panic riddled PR department) to prevent them from thinking that us regular folk are non-entities when it comes to who deserves protection and who doesn’t.

Posted: July 28th, 2012
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2012 Honda Lead 100cc LAMS Scooter Review

I’ve just picked up and thoroughly test ridden a little 100cc Honda Lead which I originally bought for my girlfriend, who wanted a bike ever since I got mine but who’s mother would have murdered her, with intent to peer pressure her into getting her L’s for it once she got her hands on it. It was sitting in the show room for a few months at most before I picked it up. Now I know I should have been worried when ‘Lead’ is also the name of a heavy metal, and rightly so, but I have to honestly review this thing (photo attached taken at a mates house where I stopped for a break from the terror of riding a children’s toy on the M4) and if I discourage one person shopping for scooters from buying a Honda, then job well done IMHO.

I personally feel that vehicles such as these should be made illegal or at least taken off the road. Full throttle of the lights and a Hyundai Getz will eat you. At 80kph it develops death wobbles something fierce and the engine rev limiter kicks in with a repetitive sound that gives the vehicle the feel of an exhausted small rodent having a heart attack after an excessive run on a treadmill.

The aesthetics of the scooter are flawed. It feels and looks flimsy and cheap, a Kymco scooter (notoriously flimsy and cheap) actually has more of a ‘finished’ feel to it, and is significantly cheaper.

They’re sold as able to reach 100kph+ (barely) for motorway use, and this is where I feel they should be canned and taken off the road; they simply can’t. The highest speed in Australia are 120 zones, anything that cannot safely do that speed or 10k’s more is unsafe and unsuitable for our roads.

The tiny little toy trike type wheels are far too small for the bad road environment of heavily used and abused Sydney streets, and frankly it was one of the scariest experiences of my life riding a children’s toy at high speed in heavy traffic. And I’ve rally raced, flown, sky dived, blah, LOTS of scary things without fretting.

Now we come to the part that adds insult to injury. The fucking thing is fresh from the factory, never been exposed to the elements, and it already has surface rust, not just on the mirrors where most two wheelers cop rust (idk why Japanese manufacturers mirrors ALWAYS rust, but they do) but every weld. Mind you, every weld is slaggy and messy as fuck and looks like it was put together in someone’s shed, but they all look like that. But these are starting to fracture and rust up, and the thing now has 20 km’s on the clock.

I would take it back to the sales yard and demand a refund, but it’s not their fault, it’s Honda’s shonky manufacturing of a dodgy and poorly constructed / thought out vehicle.

Buyers remorse++, but if I had to rate this scooter out of ten I’d give it:

1/10.

(And that’s just because I like the color.)

Posted: July 26th, 2012
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iCarte 4 Review, @NetBank / @CommonwealthBank Tech Failure

So, I got my hands on an iCarte 4. It’s basically a hardware add on for your iPhone required to do what PayPal has been doing using BlueTooth for the last half decade. It’s nice to see Australian banks trying to keep up with technology, but this hardware add on will set you back $50, and requires charging.

If that’s not annoying enough, you also have to know your NetBank client number, and getting it if you’re using a new phone number requires going in to a store. So something I got to save myself time is going to cost me more time than it will probably save accumulatively in the long run.

I don’t know why they don’t just use the in built BlueTooth like PayPal does, I can only write it off as upper management getting sucked into another techno-scam like they do with their $300,000 web forums and multi-million dollar websites all named in naive web 2.0 abbreviations that you’d expect your elderly father to embarrass you with (CommBank, NetBank, ComSec, ComInsure, ComBiz, et al)

While only the most dedicated yuppies will fork out that much for a hardware device that acts as a glorified RFID you then need to download Kaching, an app that will basically manage your new hardware add on. Then comes the hard part; you have to hope the shop accepts it.

Many city shops do already according to my googling and asking around, however many don’t. Most do accept in built RFID in your St. George bank card, American Express, or other ‘smart card’ type card. This makes the competition for this dorky add on cover immensely superior.

No one wants to pay for something they can get from other banks free. No one wants to replace their exquisitely beautiful white iPhone’s aesthetics with a chunky black cover. No one wants to then have to charge that cover when it’s not even a battery storage cover that acts as a back up energy storage device. If we’re going to have a chunky dorky cover on our phone we’ll want it to at least give us more juice.

Overall this lacklustre piece of technology is a great example of why I don’t use my Commonwealth Bank accounts, knowing many upper echelon staff members I hear about their constant spending and staff firings to squander funds on trendy-this-minute fly by night corporations that pitch wonderful new whizzbang ideas at them with steep price tags that they’re sure are essentially the next big thing only for it to expire with a poof a few months later. If only they squandered less and put that money into a social media or PR team to try and recover their ailing image.

I pity the shareholders and customers, really.

If I had to rate this, I’d rate it a 1/10. The 1 is for the fact it didn’t cost me $50.

Posted: July 9th, 2012
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Magnesium (Idk, just because, ok?!)

Magnesium makes up 13% of the earths mass, the fourth most common element behind iron, oxygen, and silicon.

Magnesium gains weight when it burns, it draws in oxygen when burning and stores extra oxygen cells within its compound creating magnesium oxide.

There are three stable isotopes, M28 has a half life of 21 hours and is made in nuclear reactors, M26 has a half life of 717,000 years and decays from 25AL, found in some meteorites, which means they were formed in the solar nebula, making it the oldest object known to man predating the solar system.

Other magnesium is created in stars, from the fusing of helium, usually helium 3, with neon in what is called the alpha process, it requires 600 megakelvins, which is 273C less than 600,000,000 C.

It was a key element in breaking the scientific theory of phlogiston, because it didn’t lose mass when burnt, proving phlogiston wasn’t a fifth element like ether.

In 1618 a farmer in Epsom, England attempted to give his cows water from a well there, they refused to drink it due to a bitter taste. He found, by accident, that the water seemed to heal cuts and scratches miraculously well, it’s fame spread and Epsom Salts (MgSO4) became a household item.

Metal ribbon wasn’t produced until 1808 by Sir Humphry Davy in England, using electrolysis of magnesia with mercury oxide to cause the otherwise crystalline powder to form into a malleable shape. He first suggested the material be called magnium, but the name changed over the years to magnesium for no apparent reason.

It’s uses from healthcare to photo engraving through to sacrificial galvanic anodes to protect underground structures and tanks from erosion and a reducing agent for uranium essential in energy production, it is one of the most useful materials known to man.

Magnesium has an atomic weight of 24.

Oxygen has an atomic weight of 16.

If you burn 0.24g of magnesium you should end up with 0.40 grams.

Thus ends the random lesson of the day.

Posted: July 6th, 2012
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Why Sponsored Tweets (@SponTwts) Are Scammers, Conmen and Criminals

Remember ages back when I tried a bunch of LOLGETREECH@HOME schemes to review them for you all? The only one that payed anything considerable was Sponsored Tweets, but you just NEVER got offers, ever.

Basically they tell Tweeters that they have MILLIONS of advertisers and post shit about how they’re flooded with work, and talk about how they need people with a hundred or even a thousand followers and you’ll be rewarded HUGELY so.

So someone with a demographic reach like me is a goldmine to them, right? Right. But they don’t have advertisers at all. And the ones they do pay for click throughs only, so you’re giving away free advertising.

The worst part is, they just spam you with these low paying things whilst by their own calculations you should be pulling $50 per tweet because you’re ten times larger than their usually twits, yet you get 2 cents a pop per click through max.

Then the scam gets deeper, when you ask why they say it’s because you’re not a premium member, and for X per month you can become one and you’ll get WAY MORE OFFERS. You don’t. I tried it, you still get maybe one or two offers per month and they’re 2 cent jobs again.

Then to make things worse you can only cash out at $50, or $100 if you’re not in the US. You’ll NEVER get that far, so the money sits in their bank collecting interest, interest they won’t give you of course.

Now if that’s not enough, they’ve recently brought in a whole new level of scamming; an inactivity fee. If you don’t use their site often enough they deduct random arbitrary numbers of cash from what you’ve earned.

That was the most shocking and outright scammish element of these swindlers.

So, I highly recommend if you ever consider trying these things that you NEVER use Sponsored Tweets, and warn your friends and family of it too.

I knew when I started that these things are ALL scams anyway, and you’d make more flipping burgers at McDonalds as slave labor amongst 14 year old kids than you EVER will with online scams.

But Sponsored Tweets is a WHOLE new level of unconscionability. Their forums are FILLED with so many people complaining about their dodgy criminal nature that they removed their forums to silence their members.

Their business practice is so unrealistic I’ve passed on the details to the FBI over in the US for investigation as they seem to breach several fraud laws in the way they operate. I’ll try and keep you guys posted on any updates I get on that investigation, but they seemed very interested in online fraudsters so it may lead to some con man ass kicking hopefully! 😀

Posted: June 30th, 2012
Categories: general
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I don’t like pears and cats like cheese.

I’m not feeling very well, and today I was tricked into eating a pear. It tasted like mushroom. I conceded to a plate of thinly sliced tasty cheese and an apple, but there was a cut up pear hiding on the plate!

Apparently cheese and pairs is an after dinner thing in Italy and most European nations have similar.

But regardless, pears are like apples retarded older brothers with the mental capacity of 5 year old who steal attention from the apples even when the apples get good grades and land a lead role in the school play of Joseph and his Technicolor Dreamcoat!

Which wasn’t actually technicolor I might add, it is a translation error of much contention, it was probably made of patches of the same colored cloth just different shades because he was a slave, well, sold into slavery by his brothers.

But he was also a Jew which makes me skeptical when the bible says he became a ruler of Egypt, that passage never sat well with me, it sounds like metaphor, he told the pharaoh to put grain in a granary during abundant seasons and the pharaoh freed him and made him vizier of Egypt.

Sounds like bullshit, IMHO.

But then again it wouldn’t be the first lie in the bible! I bet the people who wrote that are the kind of morons who put screen doors on upside down so when you go to open them in a hurry you face plant into them instead.

Do you think cats eat mice because mice eat cheese?

Cats like cheese and I’m sure a dead mouse doesn’t taste good, but maybe it’s like a kitty piñata; they eat them hoping to find a belly full of cheese?

Makes more sense than eating a dead mouse or a Jewish slave becoming a leader of a polytheistic sun worshipping middle eastern nation to say the least!

Posted: June 28th, 2012
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Sick of Unfair Online Pricing for Aussie Consumers?

There’s currently a government inquiry into it, first and foremost, on the off chance you haven’t heard about it yet. But I was urged to write this post when I noticed we are paying 30% more for Microsoft Points (a fictional currency to lock kids and parents in to buying pseudo-money ultimately at a depreciative loss of ‘change’ in transactions) than American’s do.

Now, this week is a bad example, as we’re below parity, but for the last year or so the Australian dollar has bought $1.20ish USD because their economy is … well, purely fictitious and based on cooked books, number fudging and renegging on it’s debt to other nations. So due to the severe dangers the US economy faces, our little GDP that could is steaming on ahead, prior to the recent stockmarket dicks in the ass we copped which has temporarily set us back.

That said, we pay several hundred percent more for products here than other nations do. One example that comes to mind for me is the recent motorcycle I built, $800 in parts it cost me because I imported everything piece by piece. A ‘kit’ doing the same is $1,300 in the US. In total I increased my bikes value by a RRP of $14,000 for $800, exploiting the “Aussie’s get ripped off” foundation of the free market economy as it stands.

Now I’m unsure if I support economic interventionalism, but surely something has to be done to protect the consumer when the consumer obviously is too ignorant, moronic, or apathetic to protect itself as the Australian market clearly is.

Earlier this month Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak hit out at the price disparity between the Australia and the US. Adobe Photoshop CS5 costs $2285 in the US, compared to the $4000 Aussies are forking out for the same software. The Xbox 360 250GB console costs $247 in the US, while Australians have to pay $410. The pricing of the new iPad starts at $539 in Australia, compared to $496 in the US.

These inequities are just ridiculous, it goes hand in hand with the fact that when the US oil price goes up our petrol price does, when it goes down they remind us we’re linked to the Asian oil price, and when that goes down they say that the US price is up and it’s impacting the Asian market.

Bottom line is, we’re a western nation stuck on the far side of Asia, isolated from all western nations, with a spineless consumer market, and corporations (usually from the US) out to ram unlubricated cocks in our collective arses, all whilst having the luxury of being the highest taxed nation in the world, especially when you’re in NSW with ‘surprise tax’ (see: unrealistic road rules with 1 in 6 NSWelshmen being on a suspended license or GBH, and $300+ parking tickets, yes, non Aussies reading this, I shit you not, they pay anywhere up to $410 for parking fines here. Any other nation would be burning down the state revenue building and lynching politicians for not even pretending they’re not highwaymen out to loot us) adding insult to injury, and no fucking representation from parliamentarians that provides any relief to the ‘Aussie battler’.

This inquiry is linked to everywhere by a gov website link that pretty much leads to a page that isn’t very forthcoming about how to contribute or add your complaints to the list. So, to make life easier, feel free to @bashpr0mpt me on Twitter and I’ll collate a group of grievances, but if you want to put together a submission, go to this link and click on ‘preparing a submission’, omit nothing, if it doesn’t meet form there’s a 99% chance it’s going in the bin (a reason that do gooder petition writers in this country fail all the time, there’s a set way petitions must be phrased and written, and if it isn’t, they don’t even read it or tell you so and just bin it) which can be found here: http://www.aph.gov.au/Parliamentary_Business/Committees/House_of_Representatives_Committees?url=ic/itpricing/subs.htm

Posted: June 5th, 2012
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Pennant Hills BP Employee Abusing Woman?

I had the strangest altercation at the BP on Pennant Hills Rd cross of Parkes in Pennant Hills tonight around midnight. I was visiting a friend impromptu who needed a hand with something, pulled up and I noticed a woman pleading with a heavily bearded guy behind the security screen / night window.

I couldn’t quite hear what was being said but noticed a car at the pumps and this distraught elderly woman walking off into the night. I chased after her and called out, “Is that your car?” “Yes blarble burble sniff idfk.” “Ok, I think I know what’s going on, come over here and talk to met, let’s get this sorted out.” “Burble.”

I honestly deserve some award for translating snot and tears into words, but her EFTPOS / VISA fucked up and it can only be used once without auto voiding due to its security feature, and our mate, let’s just call him beardy champ, wouldn’t let her inside to use the ATM because clearly fat little old ladies are such a threat and wouldn’t let her drive to the nearest ATM.

Mind you it’s freezing fucking cold, the middle of the night, and the middle of bum fuck nowhere with dead roads for miles and she is a she and old and now covered in snot.

I go up to the window and before I can say anything he starts rabbiting on, I explained that he can take her drivers license as she agreed to give it to him if need be to resolve this issue like human fucking beings and let her drive to the nearest ATM (5m drive, 30m walk), he flat refused.

I got a little more firm with him. Mind you I’m in motorcycle leathers, a big man, and well capable of handing most folks their own arses one on one, hell, even two on one. But no. No reason will be had in beardy champ land. He tells me how he’s been working at gas stations for three years (this is why he’s a champion, the rest is self explanatory, my mate suggested as he’s obviously Muslim maybe he didn’t like a fat white woman asking to impose to use the store ATM?) and blah fuckity blah. Snot gurgle blurb is reaching a cacophony beside me.

I dropped the big guns, “Mate, there’s two elements to larceny missing. However every element to illegal detainment and wrongful arrest are present. You spent three years working here, cool, I spent six studying law and I can tell you for a fact you’re not only wrong, but you’re bullying an old lady in the middle of the night and being a dick.”

He flipped me the bird, both hands, and yelled “Fuck you!” something I plan on going back during the daylight when the security doors aren’t shut to say g’day about. But here’s the rub. I took her license, and offered to wait until she returns. He gave me a mouth full of vitriol, and I may have goaded him a bit pointing out he has the entire fucking legal system in place to protect him as a shop owner AND business insurance and therefore has NO excuse to illegally detain a woman, or anyone, over a payment problem. Angry angry words that made little sense came back from him. Five minutes or less passed, guess who returned and paid him no problem.

Now he’s in a bind. If I or her call the cops he’s facing three really hectic charges. He’s probably changed the tapes as he looked like he realized what a fuck stain he was when she returned. The alternative is I visit him again in the morning when the doors are open and have a chat to him about his gesticulations and apparent disregard for the legal system. Or wait across the street until he knocks off and get his plates or if I feel up for a ride follow him home and write him a love letter (to his home address) just to scare a little fucking respect for women into him.

Which shall I do, dear reader? I’ll leave this up to you, @bashpr0mpt on Twitter. It’s like a choose your own adventure where you’re a big bad scary man on a big black bike. Choose wisely though.

Also, if you live near that BP, or are particularly touched by this story (Mrs. Blubburble thanked me profusely and grabbed at and hugged me, traumatic, but she seemed so blown away that a complete stranger would step up for her like that which saddens me!) I urge you to email BP Australia.

This guy deserves early retirement, clearly three years at a gas station is just too wearing on his soul.

PS: I may have accidentally stumbled when leaving the service station and put my size 12 GP boot through the BP sign on the way riding past it. So police may not be the best option. Although it was totally to avoid a patch of diesel on the ground and keep my balance.

Posted: June 5th, 2012
Categories: general
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@nswrta Bike Standards make all Classics Illegal to Raise Revenue through Fines

Inflammatory title, would you expect any less from me? But this is what I have put to the RTA in questioning their motorcycle standards (S28) on the modification of bikes, etc, which practically outlaw tens of thousands of manufactured stock motorcycles.

The requirements actually don’t serve any purpose. It’s nothing to do with safety, at all. For example, handle bar height. Ape hangers are illegal, but sure maybe some of them are too silly high and dangerous, right? Well no, my stock cruisers handle bars are too high, they came that way from the factory, as are almost all Harley Davidson’s, Yamaha’s, and Honda’s in the cruiser division.

Mud flaps are super important to your safety, aren’t they? No? Of course they’re fucking not. Even rock protection isn’t needed given the fact physics and aerodynamics are on your side, but those standards make all choppers and bobbers illegal, and even most cafe racers.

The standards in S28 outlaw pretty much every classic design of bike you think of when you think of a bad ass bike. Beyond a sewing machine sound from your exhaust, dinky handlebars, and Tron light cycle style fenders and mud guards your bike is probably illegal.

So, I wrote to them, albeit I didn’t convey my point too well as I wrote it in the middle of the night while nerd raging at their idiocy. But here it is below, I’ll update this post with any reply I get.

Hello. I’m writing to you in relation to the inconsistency of law held by the RTA towards motorcycle riders. VSI28 outlaws choppers, bobbers, cafe racers, and most other classic designed motorcycles beyond contemporary cruisers and sports bikes, etc. for transportation. It outlaws ape hangers, outlaws modified exhausts beyond that of the sewing machine sound of a stock 8 baffled exhaust (which, if you value fuel economy, is one of the first things you open up) and other generic things that one thinks of when they think of motorcycles, classic or roadster types.

I was wondering whether this is some round about way to punitively harass outlaw motorcycle gangs and by proxy is causing grief to legitimate riders in NSW? The laws of this new standard serve no engineering benefit, no safety benefit, and no logical benefit besides outlawing things for the sake of outlawing them.

Having a mud flap has absolutely no purpose on the rear, for example, and most classic bikes like choppers and bobbers lack them, or have small duck tails. You cannot be struck by a rock from the rear due to, well, physics and the way the wheel moves. You cannot even be struck by mud at the rear given the aerodynamics of the wheel. In all probability, at a speed above a fast walking pace, you cannot even be spritzed with water.

Thus, what is the purpose of outlawing tens of thousands of motorcycles and making more criminals on the road (as the RTA oft. seem to do) beyond allowing a whole new surprise tax threshold of ‘customers’? By that I mean, is the RTA making these absurd pointless standards requirements so that they can then send out the police tyre biters to raise more state revenue? Because that is all it is doing.

Another issue, ape hangers. 38cm is the maximum height you can have the highest point of the handlebar above the steering yolk. Now I ride a cruiser, it’s little. Very little. In fact, most people would call me a punce for riding it. It’s completely stock, mind you. And yet the handlebars are 45 cm risen above the yolk at the highest point, 65 if you include the mirrors which are affixed thus part of the assembly. So basically I bought an illegal bike, and yet, every Yamaha cruiser manufactured in the last forty years is also illegal according to these standards.

That brings me to my final point. Most of the modifications listed in the Standard I am referring to are things most bikes have breached from manufacture. In fact, you can walk into ANY bike shop in NSW and find multiple bikes for sale all of which breach multiple entries of this standard. There’s six bobbers for sale and one chopper down at Penrith Yamaha right now. Four bobbers and one chopper at Campbelltown. These are all registered motorcycles, that have roadworthy ceritifcation.

So I put it to you that either the RTA’s farcical standards which have no impetus beyond making more riders criminals and potential tax collection points of state revenue are not only inconsistent but seem to turn a blind eye to the tens of thousands of motorcycles imported every week you can buy from a shop front perfectly registered and in stock condition that already breach these laws, leaving the rider open to harassment and fines by police.

Why would the RTA want to do this to the road users who obviously are the entire purpose the RTA have the pleasure of existing? These standards affect nothing, beyond making more criminals, and more fines, and more revenue for the state.

Posted: March 23rd, 2012
Categories: general
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Skeezy Keesey of Invisible Children; Slacktivists more Dangerous than Kony

So, Ben Skeezy the slacktivist who embezzled millions of dollars in travel expenses to save children from a monster who left Uganda six years ago and hasn’t been heard of since has fired his counter shot after the broadside bloggers gave him (Myself, proudly, being one of the first noted by News Ltd.) and it fell short.

It’s spent very little on the people it’s claiming to protect, as the San Diego hipsters are found in various photos floating around weilding RPG’s and looking smug–albeit as fragile as Bambi in a bull pen–amongst a bunch of Ugandan soldiers. The irony lies in the fact that those who helped put the message out, are those most critical, and those firing afforementioned broadsides at these craptivists.

To add insult to injury the fuck knuckle admitted that the vast majority of missing funds on ‘transport’ also contributed to flights all over the world to help 3,000 people view his shitty videographical piece. 3,000 people got flown. To see. His shitty movie. If you’re not outraged by that more than by Kony baby-fucking his way through Africa and conveniently not being anywhere to seen when a bunch of ad hoc film makers who profess that ‘daddy catches bad guys for a living’ to their children and other vacuous lumps with the IQ on par with their retarded hipster babies, then you really need to unplug and gtfo the internet, as you really shouldn’t be operating heavy machinery.

And yes, if you’re that doltish, a computer is totally heavy machinery for your brain.

So, what can you do about this? Not much. RT articles pointing out what charlatans they are. I’ll look into possibly contacting a few people stateside to get their charity audited, yet beyond that even I’m pretty much powerless to stop shysters conning people for sympathy (and sadly money).

Although this has been a good lesson in why you need to think critically. You’ll notice in my propogation of the message (after watching the full video and doing a bit of internuts research thereafter) that I was cynical albeit skeptical in my approach but thought that it may be a worthy cause.

It’s just a shame the huge media giants and news companies out there aren’t as intellectually gifted and switched on as a mildly retarded gamer and tech blogger, huh?

Posted: March 13th, 2012
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Italian Barista’s Slutty Outfit Addiction has Wives Woeful

“Here the high-waisted trousers no longer know what they are!” states one sassy anti sexpresso public servant. I don’t know what’s more amusing. Women bawwing that their husbands and boyfriends are going to a cafe with a scantly clad barista or her personal fan website’s horrible translation into English.

I don’t know if you’ve heard, but it’s made the news almost globally, that women of a certain town in Italy have b& their boys from visiting a specific cafe. The barista, Laura Maggi. works in a little cafe in Bagnolo Mella, near Brescia, and decided to spruce up business by wearing slutty outfits.

From PVC (ew, thrush factory!) to lacey underwear and even down to tassle-tittied pasties, she has a keen business acumen of how stupid desperate men will do anything for a bit of T&A. But aside from her slutty photos (which can be found all over the internets) the translation of her website had me in tears.

First and foremost, here are some links to her more provocative photos. (NSFW obviously)

http://www.google.com.au/search?q=Laura+Maggi&hl=en&safe=off&prmd=imvnsuo&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=1y9IT_uVOpCuiQeyw8SADg&ved=0CEIQsAQ&biw=1680&bih=949

And more raunchy ones at:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2105339/Sexpresso-Wives-ban-husbands-visiting-Italian-cafe-busty-barmaid-serves-drinks-skimpy-outfits.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

But seriously, this part had me cacking myself. I love bad translations, it really is brilliant how batshit insane things can seem if translated, or worse, translate something from English to, say, Chinese and then back again. Go on, do it, I dare you. Either way you’ll probably get something more coherent than this (translated by Google Chrome on the fly):

PHOTOS – And Laura knows to be fair. Even more. Post all your photos on Facebook, before I hang them in his restaurant. And business is booming more than they say they are even tripled in the last year. Business is business? Do not you agree the mayoress of Bagnolo Mella. Indeed, ironically: “Here the high-waisted trousers no longer know what they are,” accuses the Mayoress Christine Almici. “Now the country is only known from the sexy bar. Here the towns furious, have even turned to the police. ” Really? “Sure. Ms. Maggi has been summoned to headquarters. It warned verbally. ” Someone has even given permission to work until late at night. “Permission has it, but I knew that would serve cocktails dressed like that? Give me time, I’m thinking of a measure. Here the public has gone to hell. “

Posted: February 25th, 2012
Categories: epiclullz, general, gossip, lifestyle, nsfw
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Update on the Telstra 100 mbps Link

I know a lot of you have been following this for the past month and a half, and I’ve gotten a few comments demanding an update since the install didn’t go trough yesterday so here goes.

Basically the tech was a no show, I sat around like a dick until 6, then spent the rest of the night trying to find out why.

After several hours on hold with intermittent conversations with the off shore call centre, I got absolutely no answer, and waited / spoke to them until my home phone went too flat to make it through another long hold period.

One tech was so terribad that I had to spell my username 8 times, 3 of those were phonetics (bravo alpha sierra hotel papa romeo zero mike papa tango!) to the point that I had to give her my old Telstra account details so she could copy paste my username and replace the o with a zero.

That call was the furthest I got, and once she began to realize it was a hard work call, she did what I’ve had two Telstra outsourced staff do so far, hung up on me. A well documented feature of whatever the call centre Telstra outsources to in the Phillipines.

(Check Whirlpool for hundreds of examples, although there’s no point filing official complaints because they can simply say the line died or the user hung up or some such, along with stupidly fake names, this outsourced call centre is a glorified answering service, if your problem is beyond year 7 computer science trouble shooting they’ll have an actual tech support worker from Australia (or Egypt, those guys are really good!) call you back ‘within 2-3 business days’) to address the problem!)

I was chasing it up by 8:30 this morning and pretty much spent the entire day waiting again. Thankfully a bloke named Russ chased the issue up, and after a run around himself told me that the technician ‘rang the customer on their mobile’ but ‘couldn’t get through’.

Now I don’t know about you, but if you book me as a plumber to install a hot water heater, and I know you don’t have one and have taken 1.5-2 months of fuck ups to finally book me that on the day when you lose a day of work sitting there, if I can’t get you on your mobile, it doesn’t mean you suddenly changed your mind and don’t want a hot water heated installed.

Fuck, calling is a courtesy, but I would rock up and do the fucking job, because that’s what the customer and every sane person would expect.

What’s more, the idiot didn’t even ring THE PRIMARY CONTACT NUMBER FOR THE ACCOUNT, he rang a secondary / emergency / technical contact not the primary.

WHO DOES THAT?

Either way, I pointed out yesterday that if the wait is another month, or even a week, it may be more prudent not to go ahead with the service transfer of all things to Telstra.

I pointed out to Russ that on completion I’ll be publishing my Optus logs, revealing how terribad they are, and giving a solid well documented consumer point of view like lots of bloggers do these days (hell, half the way I decide on purchases of goods and services is based on contemporaneous consumer notations of customer experience.

However at present my Telstra logs are now bigger than my Optus log and I’m not even officially a customer of theirs yet at the new house! So if this is what goes on when they haven’t got you yet and should be doing anything they can to court your business, what happens when I’m locked in a contract for two years?

This afternoon Russ emailed me and told me that I’m rebooked in for the 27th, which is one week after its due date and thus falls into my ‘if it’s another two months or hell even if it’s another week’ deal breaker term. I pointed out the time is a bit much and asked if there’s anything sooner. So we’ll see if Telstra can redeem itself.

I have, however, also tweeted @ InterNode and iiNet letting them know I’m open to courting if their VIP management teams want to grab another high profile gamer and blogger. I’ve since received contact from iiNet yet nothing from InterNode, yet.

I’ll wait for Telstra’s next response before getting into too much conversation. But while I’m theoretically locked in contract, I have at all times stressed expediency is the most integral element of this deal, and have had provision made to me that they understand and will act accordingly.

This is enough, in a consumer situation where you’re being fucked around, to be able to exit from the contract with no breaking fees, even AFTER installations take place, etc. So thanks to the fact Australia has good consumer protection, unlike our poor chaps over in the US who pretty much have no rights, there is still course for resolution.

Anyway, there you have it, now stop asking! 🙂

Posted: February 21st, 2012
Categories: general
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Dear @Optus, I Was Waiting for Vday to Pass to Say … You’re Dumped

I’ve tried to humor the OptusNet connection at my new place, but it’s become absolutely intolerable. After several technician call outs, I found their tech support department more often than not didn’t give a shit, and were a glorified outsourced answering service who’d then send a real technician or organise a call back from one, after asking you stupid questions about your home computer (which if you have four laptops and three PC’s plus two tablets and three iPhone’s running in the house, both cabled and uncabled, all manifesting the same problem, is moot, but DON’T TELL THEM THAT, you confuse them and they go into a loop of death).

After a day trying to talk to their social media team to no avail, I rang their outsourced answering machine and spoke with ‘Snita’ (pronounced saneetsa), explained the problem and was told that it’s the $300 NetGear 3000 they sold me three weeks ago after claiming it was the NetGear 2000 they’d sold me several months prior. I wasn’t going to humor another modem purchase and politely called bullshit and explained that the waveform of speed tests run indicate a fluctuation in line quality dB and nothing to do with the modem (all diagnostics showed it was fine) but she didn’t understand.

She told me that ‘NetGear and Optus are aware of this problem and are working together to fix it as soon as possible, so if the problem is still happening in a few weeks’ I should call back. Again, politely called her out on it. She ran through a bunch of pointless diagnostics, which I humored (I actually did, to my chagrin, I even rebooted my modem and PC and hard wired up) only to have her say ‘I’ll connect you to a NetGear technician.’ and I was like no no no dude, I don’t want NetGear, I want a linesman. Again I broke another Optus outsourcer by asking them to think outside the square, she fell into circular reasoning and speech and again went on about ‘I asked earlier if you had another modem (she didn’t actually) because we could get you to use that for a few weeks until the problem is fixed, but if you don’t we will have to call NetGear’.

I again stated that the modem is absolutely fine, the line quality is so terrible and slipping out of band from the infrastructure outside that even the cable television is affected (both use the ‘black sausage’ coax that SingTel Optus services run through in Australia) and there was dead silence for about ten seconds, maybe more, then a click and the busy signal.

Yes. An Optus tech supporter did what the Whirlpool forum is full of statements of Optus tech supporters doing. Fucker hung up because the problem was too hard and she couldn’t be fucked dealing with it.

I called back and escalated to a L3 TL or floor manager and explained everything again in painful detail, he ordered a lines man to come around on Friday, and wanted to chase Snita up, but I pointed out all she has to say is ‘The line died.’ or ‘The user hung up.’ and there’s no way to prove the contrary so it’s pointless.

I asked if there’s a feedback email for Optus I could have, nope. I asked if there’s a complaints department, sadly it’s only open 9-5 because it’s like the only department Optus haven’t outsourced yet. I’ll give them a call tomorrow and link to this.

But in the meantime, I want to stress as much as I can, if you use Optus, Optus anything, don’t. Just @Telstra and link to this article and they’ll do you a good deal to swap over to them. Replacing two Optus TV hook ups, an Optus phone and OptusNet cable has me saving about $30 per month AND I’m getting full proper HD (no laggy fucking press a button and six seconds later the channel changes too!) along with a 100 mbit down 1 mbit up (I’ll admit the 1 mbit up is utterly moronic and restrictive, bringing the 100 mbit down to around 70 mbit down usable) along with a ping that is realistic, Optus the best I got was just under 100 ms. I got that on an ISDN in 1996.

Another problem you’ll find with OptusNet internet is that they cache all big sites like YouTube, etc. So you’ll be pulling 10mbit+ on a speed test, yet you can’t stream a 240p YouTube video without letting it butter for three times the duration of the video. One way to prove they cache YouTube specifically is, download the same video or movie you’re watching on YouTube from a torrent site, if you’re getting 25 k/s down on BitTorrent or higher, that’s about 1 second of footage every 0.75 seconds of download, thus enough to stream. Then go to YouTube and grab the same content, at the same resolution, and watch it have to buffer over and over again.

Mind you if you ask them about this they plead ignorant, or if you call them out on it they duck and run.

Worst part is, they always insist you use some shitty in house speed test (speedtest.syd.optusnet.com.au) which is a total scam. If you don’t believe me, disconnect your modem completely after loading the page, then run a speed test. You’ll get a 10ms – 20ms ping from the Optus server. A server that it cannot possibly communicate with because the coax is removed. You’ll also find it’s speed measures usually 10mbit down higher than ANY other industry standard speed testing medium and 2-3mbit up higher than the same.

Anyway, I’m fucking done. I tried to be patient, I tried to work with them. I’m going to demand a refund for the past months we’ve been having problems, demand a refund for this stupid fucking useless modem they forced us to buy, and if they don’t pay the fuck up I’m going to go to the TIO and Department of Fair Trading and make them hurt. Just filing with those two companies forces the investigated party to have to pay a high administration fee for the pleasure of having their arses investigated for being douchebags.

After waiting ten minutes to connect to a Battlefield 3 server only to get maybe 20 seconds game time before a drop out hit, all fucking day, wasting my only real me-day this week, I’m fuming.

Anyway, enough ranting for one post. Don’t use Optus. They’re ALMOST as bad as TPG. Almost.

Posted: February 15th, 2012
Categories: consumer reviews, general
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Bit.ly Needs to Drop I, O, L, 0 From Shortening Suffix @bitly

Ok, you know I hate being a cynical arsehole who points out blatently obvious things in an intellectually arrogant way and rubs a companies face into it to humilitate them for your pleasure and amusement, dear reader, but I must.

I’ve noticed how easy it would be if I use bit.ly as my main shortening site, and then anyone who gets a random combination of six or so random letters and numbers can just add in the rest in their browser, especially given how much content I put out in peak periods.

I realised however that the more I did that, the more I’s and l’s, or O’s and 0′s, and other such things can become confusing with various fonts of various phone operating systems through SMS (text messaging, for my mentally handicapped friends) and that if they were removed, and say, a seventh slot added, it would expand the variability of URL’s to allow more traffic from their end, along with eliminating you sending your mother to a lolcat only for her to accidentally be URL hijacked to goatse.

So, I have blogged, and I shall email this blog post to them, and update you all with the reply I get.

Posted: February 1st, 2012
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@BlacktownCC Held my Cat For Ransom

Edit: Almost one month and no reply to my email to Blacktown City Council, or their pound, and no reply from the @blacktowncc social media team.

Note to Blacktown City Council’s PR department reading this: There is a note at the end of this so you understand just how horrible a mess you’ve got yourselves in.

My cat disappeared for a night a couple of days ago, but reappeared in the middle of the night. The next morning, she vanished again. Turns out she was abducted by some moron who thought she was a stray, from our front yard, and taken to their home where she caused a fuss until they let her go the first night, assumedly, and the next time they took her to the pound. Now, I’m not saying they’re dickheads, they probably thought they were doing the right thing in some twisted bunny boiler bizarre way, but .. well, they’re dickheads.

But the biggest dickhead of this entire encounter is Blacktown City Council. The Companion Animals Act 1998 has provisions for animals born before the date it came in, which includes my cat, however on arriving at the pound they insisted I fork out $350 or there abouts, for ‘Lifetime Registration’, microchipping, and her stay. Now these are things I didn’t ask for, and if it weren’t for the negligence of the idiot who catnapped her in the first place, and these are things I wouldn’t have to do per the act. However, I was directed to the usual scabby print outs on walls of misquoted legislation you get at places that deal with people who might not be too impressed getting surprise blackmailed for their pets. It cited a subclause of a clause of a regulation of an act,[1] whereas the ACT itself said she is exempt. The parenthetical terms that they based their entire ransom on was ‘including a council pound’.

Now statutory interpretation is a very fickle fiend. That’s sarcasm, it’s written in plain English and is pretty simple to understand, especially if you apply a purposive evaluation of the legislation or look to extrinsic materials that were used in the framing period such as reading speeches. Either way, unless an act states that it is retroactive it isn’t. So my argument that the act didn’t apply to her was valid. The regulation on the wall was also invalid, even if it were valid it would be a stretch.

The problem with this situation is, you’ve lost your pet, you’re in a tizz, you heard from a neighbor that some dickhead took it, then suddenly you’re at a front desk desperate to get your pet out and they’re telling you all these things and costs you have to do and pay which always include extortionate fees from the state government in the way of the constant ‘surprise taxation’ I keep telling my international viewers about. To resolve this situation I would have to had gone and gotten an injunction from the local courthouse, which would take a week, or I have to pay the ransom and let them hurt my elderly cat who’s just recovering from a very, very serious operation which was extremely touch and go, most of you might remember that.

I had booked in to visit my vet, he asked to bring her to him if she had to be chipped, so he could do it under anaesthetic to lessen the trauma and injury. This wasn’t accepted. I understand the people there were doing there job, and they were very empathic to the situation, but the bottom line is this is a disgusting and inappropriate act. We are the only state in the country, and one of two countries in the world where it’s mandatory to chip or register, and I understand the purpose of it, however it could be resolved with an ear tattoo, or a collar and tag, registerable online by the owner, bringing the entire administrative costs to $0 and the physical cost incurred to a few bucks. If the PURPOSE of this rubbish is to ensure animals are registered and reduce lost animals / increase returns, this would be the approach, as I guarantee you every owner would do it, breeders, stores, and adoption agencies could foot the $2 bill and give them away, hell I’d even throw a few grand into a public fund to launch such a scheme.

But I truly and utterly don’t believe the purpose of this is so Blacktown City Council, or the NSW Government, can look after the well being of companion animals, and believe beyond any doubt it is just another underhanded little fee that adds to the entire most-taxed-nation-on-earth along with compounded surprise taxes along the way.

Microchipping is a cool idea, but it’s cruel, painful, and uneccessary (the latter as I outlined above), it uses a 12-14 guage needle, and is done without anaesthetic, even when I asked if anaesthetic could be used, and offered to pay extra, I was told they can’t and aren’t taught to do it that way. I discussed it with a staff member there, who assured me it’s not very painful to the animal and they don’t show pain. I countered that that’s because the animals are all shitting themselves because they just got shanked by a stranger in a strange place so they’ll just go limp and take whatever is done to them or flip out, the latter often being put down to circumstance.

He was reassuring and very professional, I must say, although I did challenge him and ask if he’d microchip himself. He explained that it’d hurt him, and if he got stabbed in the neck with it he’d be hospitalized and probably need stitches. I pointed out that whilst I believe he believes they don’t feel pain, 80+ years ago we believed animals don’t feel pain at all because they have ‘no soul,’ and pointed out that common sense would say a giant piece of steel piercing your flesh will hurt like a bitch. I also pointed out that while he’d be scared of getting stabbed with it, it’s 20 times larger for a cat who’s 20 times smaller than a human, so it’d be like getting shanked with a bayonette.

The reason I’m making a big deal out of this is because I have been ambushed by the system, had my cat ransomed to me, and it was all done in a way that assured I did not have access to legal remedy in a way that I could take my cat and we could settle the matter civilly at a later point, the fact their rules and regulations force you to have to either do as they say to get your pet then chase it up later, or abandon your pet for a week to a month (by which point it may probably be up for adoption or destroyed) is utterly ridiculous in a civilised nation in 2012.

Blacktown City Council, you ought to be ashamed of yourself, as should the NSW Government or any body supporting this nonsense. I spent the car ride home covered in blood, trying to settle an injured animal down that was bleeding profusely (I’ve only just finally stopped the bleeding, an hour later, and she’s in serious discomfort and pain from it) all because some dickhead decided to try and steal my pet. You’ve made a victim of crime a victim of the system, without reason, rationality, or common sense applied anywhere therein. You’ve taken away my constitutional right to legal remedy by holding my animal ransom. And you’ve pissed off the wrong nerd.

Note: The people at the animal holding facility were fantastic, professional, and did Blacktown Council more justice than they should have, so I don’t want this in any way to reflect badly on them. They were obeying idiotic internal rules and regulations enforced on them by some desk jockey twenty miles away who has no idea of the internal running of the facility, and clearly has no common sense. It just makes me disgusted even more that such fantastic employees have to also suffer this idiocy. The entire costs came to approx. $200 as she was desexed, etc, etc, but could have exceeded $350 as I was first appraised on the phone including holding and sustenance.

[1] Companion Animals Regulation 2008 (3) 23, which also is not retroactive and thus still not valid to the animal in question if it was born prior to 2008. Meaning they don’t need to be registered or chipped if they were born before 1998, and the ‘once they turn up here they have to be’ part doesn’t apply if they were born prior to 2008. This doesn’t mean that the regulation itself isn’t completely moronic and just good old New South Wales revenue raising.

Email sent to Blacktown City Council on the issue, to see what kind of escalation I can get about their horribly moronic practices:

Dear Sir / Madam,

Just touching base further to our conversation today when I picked up Mang (now known as Prisoner 00546) relating to the Companion Animals Act 1998. I wish to have this issue looked into and escalated, and hope to at least provide some form of systemic change to allow staff members, who are clearly experienced in animal management, to have the right to discretion in these matters.

I investigated what I had said about the Act not being retroactive, nor the Regulations, and on returning home and examining the regulations in full on AustLII I found that it isn’t retroactive. Meaning any animal born before the end of 1998 need not be forcibly microchipped and registered, and the parenthetical of the subclause of the clause of the Regulation of the Act on the wall is spurious at best but could only be applied to animals born after 2008.

The purpose of the legislation is obvious, and the reasoning for it not including animals born before X date is to prevent having to register an animal that is probably on it’s last legs anyway. With statutory interpretation, common sense rules. Our laws are written so the average person can understand them, and if it were meant to apply to animals before a date, it will say so. In a situation like this, I was left with the alternative of seeking my constitutionally afforded access to legal remedy but at a cost of not having my animal released into my custody for the duration of the matter, which could be weeks to months. Or to agree to what I am told and do as I am told to get my pet back.

The logical way of handling this in the best interest of the animal, the owner, and most definitely the pound itself–given that my address, and contact details, and registered state identification were surrendered in the retrieval process and that chipping and registration were to occur at my private vet at a 2PM appointment–would be to release the animal into the custody of the owner pending resolution of the matter.

Most people will not follow these situations up because they’re just thankful and relieved to have their animal back, but that is how horrible and unjust issues fly under the radar and go so long without being repealed or remedied.

I do strongly wish to stress however that your staff were extremely professional, courteous, and patient in handling this matter and I commend this thoroughly. You have done Blacktown City Council more justice than they deserve on this issue. But the whole matter becomes even more disgusting when staff members’ hands are tied by desk jockeys who have only a pen and paper understanding of the running of the facility.

On leaving this morning, my cat has yet to cease showing signs of extreme discomfort from the implant, and is walking crouched (as they do when they have something stuck to their fur) and growling if touched or approached, all extremely out of character for a super friendly, loving, affectionate animal that behaves more like a loyal dog than a cat, inclusive of obedience to commands or even hand signals. It took me half an hour to stop the bleeding.

On a brief review of chipping practice, local anaesthetic appears to be (and rightly so, it’s illogical not to) the norm for everywhere but Australia, with most private vets seeming to opt for it also, given that it would be the equivalent of a human being stuck with a bayonet on a size based ratio with a pager being shoved under their skin between their shoulder blades.

This practice could be averted with a collar and tag, or ear tattoo, costing a few dollars, with owners filling out the registration on line at a central database. I’d even hazard a guess that adoption agencies, animal welfare groups, and animal rights organisations would give collars and tags with e-registration methods away free of charge. If the purpose of registration and chipping is in the interest of animals and owners, then the current system is not the way as people will only do it when forced to. I honestly believe the purpose of registration is revenue raising by the state government, as from my reading on the matter none of the funding goes into the hands of the pound or to companion animal care.

The practice itself is something that cannot be resolved at this level, and I am aware of this, but the manner in which the practice is meted out while animals are held ransom is inappropriate in a civilised society. The fact that staff are not given the discretion to waive this issue, or handle it within their professional judgment being persons who are on the front lines and dealing with the reprocussions of silly policies is even worse than the practice itself.

Note to Blacktown City Council: My blog has a demographic reach of in excess of 40 times your cities population. It provides more exposure than a prime time television advertising campaign operated for in excess of a month on Australian television. The demographic includes many celebrities, influential people, and people you really don’t want to look like a complete dick in front of. Congratulations.

Posted: January 25th, 2012
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@VictoriaPolice Overreact, Entire Heavily Armed Cop Division vs 10 Teenage Kids

In another example of why I often ask why I live in this police state of Australia, we have a ridiculous incident, on par with the constant police chases that lead to OUR deaths chasing petty criminals, through to Victorian Police’s not forgotten reputation of shooting dozens of people a year who are entirely unarmed ‘by accident’.

This is a good example, a bunch of kids hold a party, it gets ‘out of control’, the cops rock up and no one wants to talk to them, so the police try and force entry, the kids lock themselves indoors, then the cops call in the entire Tactical Response Group in the middle of the night for a ‘tense six hour stand off’, fuck knows what was tense about it, you’ve got body armor wearing goons with MP5′s versus unarmed 16 year olds who’re terrified and don’t want to move let alone talk to the cops.

This entire operation would have probably cost us tax paying fools tens of thousands of dollars of misappropriated police funding, aside from the fact we’re the only country in the world that, for an extremely low crime rate, arm our police with assault weaponry, handguns, chemical weapons, electrical weapons, melee weapons, body armor, the most expensive encrypted radio network in the world and heavily modified luxury sports cars that break in at $120 a pop which they then proceed to use to hoon around for no reason or do doughnuts in up near the old drive-in theatre in Blacktown.

Anyway, read the article, you’ll be QQing at how the media even tried to pretend this was legitimate news and not a shocking and disgusting example of police over-reaction and typical thuggery of a law enforcement culture that thinks it’s NYPD versus crips when our crims are so low key and laughable … well, the UK has 8 times our crime rate, 40 times our population, and their cops aren’t even armed!

A TENSE five and a half hour siege in Melbourne’s west has been ended peacefully by police today.
Heavily armed police surrounded a Deer Park property, in Melbourne’s west, after a group of teens locked themselves inside and refused to come out.

Police were called to the scene about 3.30am when neighbours complained that a party had got out of control with windows broken and damage caused to neighboring cars and houses.

Police had been told a gun had been brandished at the party and were today still investigating the claim despite not finding one at the property this morning.

When occupants of the house – aged between 16 and 20 – refused to leave the house to speak to police Special Operations Group officers, uniformed police and the dog squad blocked off the suburban street and ordered about 11 people out of the house.

Using megaphones, police coerced several people out of the house and took them away one by one in hand cuffs for questioning.

But it was not until just before 9am that the end finally ended when the final person surrendered to police as officers threatened to storm the house at gunpoint.

Several charges are expected to be laid in relation to the siege which came a day after a 23-year-old man was charged in relation to a siege at Werribee.

Posted: December 31st, 2011
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